Hair Horrors
I told the woman who cuts my hair that it grows really fast, so to cut it a bit shorter . . . but I didn't mean THAT short! I looked like Brittany Spears without the umbrella, GI Jane without the great bod. I called Jack to warn him. My next door neighbor Gary, the master of understatement and quiet aplomb, saw me and yelled, "Jesus Christ!"
"No, it's only me with a really short haircut."
Jack walked in the door, took one look at me and said, "We're not going out anywhere this weekend."
"Well, at least it's good to know that you're not shallow," I replied. "By the way, do you happen to remember that you're BALD!" (Not that there's anything wrong with that.)
posted by Gail @ 10:59 AM
1 Comments
1 Comments:
Bad haircuts are the reason hats were invented. Or, you could use this as an opportunity to get a wig. Long blond hair...yeah...then what would Jack say?
Or, just for a prank, you could get a mullet wig (often referred to as a Camaro crash helmet)and make new friends down at the Waffle House.
Jack would be so proud. You could buy a Confederate flag and put it out front like your neighbors.
This is not going to be good for your stress level. The stalking lesbians will be out in force and it will not be safe to go to the grocery store until your hair grows out.
I think if you got a long blond wig, you would look just like Anna Nicole Smith. Think how proud Jack will be, and the neighbors--imagine the envy.
I heard that there is a Beauty Shop in your area that is giving away a free kraut and kielbasa dinner for 2 with every Anna Nicole wig.
Oh waiter, waiter--I have long blond hairs in my kraut and kielbasa entree. Sorry madam, Anna Nichole ate here 2 months ago. Those waiters, they are so witty.
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