Mystery Solved, But Will You Act?!

How many times have you (or someone you know) thrown a shoe at a fellow vehicle passenger, lost the shoe out the window, and left it behind on the road?

How often have you run across the street, blown a shoe and continued on your way half shod?

Have you ever, while carrying an extra pair of shoes, dropped one of the said shoes and chosen to simply not pick it up, or perhaps not notice? And if so, why were you carrying an extra pair of shoes? (That might not really be relevant to this particular query, but I would like to know.)

If the above scenario did happen, once the errant shoe was discovered absent, did you then decide not to retrace your steps to retrieve the lost foot covering?

Now, one last question: how many singular shoes have you seen either in or alongside the road throughout your life?

Why am I asking you these pointed questions and hopefully clarifying the improbability of stated scenarios? Because my friends, my family and I have pondered this bizarre mystery on many a road trip, and have come to the tragic conclusion that every such shoe marks the site of an alien abduction. Yes, I said it. Scoff if you will, or provide a better explanation . . . if you can!!

I try to put this horrific realty out of my mind most of the time, but today, there it was—another singular shoe in the middle of a main thoroughfare. "Abduction!" I yelled aloud. A last-ditch effort of the abductee to signal his/her exit, or a cruel calling card of a maniacal Martian? It’ a slap in the face of all Earthlings, yet we continue to turn a blind eye.

The only other explanation is that the aliens have but one foot, are only stealing footwear minus the wearer of same, and then discarding the unnecessary shoe; which would also solve the mystery of all those missing matches to my socks.