My CAN'T WAIT TO MISS IT List:

The farewell series TV tour of “The Dukes of Hazzard” – yes it’s being advertised

Car shows

Graduation ceremonies

A televised funeral of a member of the Martin Luther King family (No disrespect intended but those things go on for a minimum of five hours because every politico in the damn country has to show up and say something.)

My own funeral for that matter, just because I’d prefer not to attend that function.

Wrestling and all that it implies

Christmas party open houses with no alcohol, hard cookies, and boring people that can’t be made more interesting because there is no alcohol!

Piano recitals

Any appearance of Regis Philbin, that chirpy whats-her-name co-host he has, Rosie O’Donnell, Charo, Katie Couric, Deborah Messing, or Celine Dion

The Country Music Awards

Renaissance Festivals (My Lady this!)

Any basket, candle, make-up, cooking, jewelry or some other sell you something you don’t need or want for exorbitant prices party put on at people’s homes. (Luckily I quit responding to any such invitations and am no longer asked to attend. I cry myself to sleep every night—NOT!)

Most gatherings attended by masses of humans, including weddings, especially weddings with receptions at the church--snooze

If it requires the wearing of panty hose, I’m out!

Group sing-alongs

Parties with name tag stickers (this always portends disaster)

Family reunions, unless it’s not your family and they are serving alcohol, but when does that perfect mix ever occur?

(To be continued . . .)