Don't Let the Turkeys Get You Down!

Well the past few weeks have been full of joy: misunderstandings with friends, astronomical vet bills for two aging dogs, counted-upon freelance jobs that didn’t materialize, and getting ready to have overnight guests and the entire family for the Thanksgiving feast. The holidays are upon us and I’m going as Tiny Tim. Last night I “slept” with a twelve-year-old Lab (that must have blood work then surgery on Monday for an abscessed tooth) and a pug that snores so loudly I once threw a pillow over his head so that my phone interviewee couldn’t hear him. Usually the Lab sleeps on a dog bed on the floor (or on the living room sofa) and the pug in my son’s room, but last night was musical beds. The pug insisted on sleeping with us in my son’s absence; Jack moved to my son’s room because of the pug’s snoring; Lab (Max) saw that my husband was gone and jumped up on the bed with me and the pug.

Once the pug takes its position lying on top of your legs or arms, it is not moving. Amazing how a twenty-two pound dog can feel like the Rock of Gibraltar. Careful, so as not to awaken the 110-pound Max on my other side, I twisted my legs into a configuration that isn’t accommodated by any joint in my body. He wakes up and appears restless so I get up—it’s freezing!—go to the kitchen, and hide a pain pill in a piece of cheese. As I offer it to Max in the dark, he looks at me like, “And why would I want cheese at 3 a.m.?” He reluctantly takes it, and I try to find a vacant spot in the bed for all of my parts. As I turn over, something cold and squishy hits my shoulder: it’s the uneaten cheese cube.

Pain pills for Lab: $50
Thanksgiving turkey: $25
Blood work for Lab: $200
Tooth removal for Lab: $500-$700
Seriously considering eating the cheese with the dog’s pain pill in it: Priceless.